Another Sephardic Voice – by Paula Rose Michelson

This week I have posted my interview with Betty who, at age twenty, saw and heard things while traveling with her parents, but did not understand or question anything until later in her life.

Before you read her interview, I want to mention that it is thought, and I believe, that there are no secrets in family’s just things we have not shared with each other. However, we somehow seem to know or sense many things though they remain unspoken. This is easy to understand because each of us wants to be accepted and it is a normal fear that our secrets, those hidden things that make us different, are unacceptable or even worse shameful.

Those in recovery call this bundle of guilt, ‘The Invisible Elephant in the Living Room.’ Everyone is aware of and has to walk around this problem or pretend it does not exist. Once we do that for one person it becomes easier to do it for the next person, and so it continues perpetuating the myth that our family is perfect. 'Perfect' is a very hard place to live in and a harder place to keep that way when reality threatens to intrude. I hope that being aware of this trap will help each of us realize that everyone, whether they admit it or not, has fallen victim to 'Perfect' or as it is most often labeled 'The Elephant Syndrome.’ And I hope that finding out about this common madly will make you chuckle as I did when I realized that this experience and the feelings of shame it arouses is part of the human condition.

Before you read Betty’s brief testimony, ask yourself:

• Why am I hiding all that I am or know?
• Do the members of my family know what I know?
• If they do, what would happen to them and me if I revealed the ‘Elephant?’


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Betty’s Voice~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I was in my early twenties, my parents took me on a trip to visit relatives in Saltillo, Mexico, where my grandfather Miguel Narro was born and raised. They were rich and very Catholic. They had disowned my grandfather when he accepted Yeshua as his Savior and became a Protestant pastor. Many years later, my great-aunt Rosario (Rosary) confided to my mother that there had been two rabbis in the Narro family. After that, my mother wore a Star of David that she had bought. She told my son John David that we were Jewish. My grandfather refused to eat pork, but we never knew why. No one ever talked about our Jewish heritage. However, now I know that some believed we were Jewish and other family members denied it. My father, David Alcala, most likely had Jewish ancestry also since Alcala is a Sephardic Jewish name. My great-grandfather Ambrosio Alcala was born in Alcala de Henares, a city in Spain that had an imposing Jewish presence and two synagogues.

Elizabeth Alcala-Narro Bennett is a Sephardic Jew whose children bring the gospel to those in Spain. She worships at a Messianic congregation.


John 8:31-32 is a very important verse to me because it says, “To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” The meaning is clear, truth, no hiding- but admitting the truth sets us free. Free to receive forgiveness, healing, absolution or most importantly for my heroine Naomi, the ability to own who she is in the full light of day. If your journey mirrors hers, continue to sojourn with us for each of us has had to learn to trust, release, release, and trust.

A Sephardic Voice – by Paula Rose Michelson

If you have read chapter one of Casa de Naomi, which is posted at http://www.PaulaWordsmith.com, you know that my heroine has a secret. Before you get into the body of this post, please remember that everyone has secrets – some keep us safe, others keep us hidden. Now with complete candor knowing that no one is looking over your shoulder or able to hear your thoughts, ask yourself:

• Do I, a friend, or some one in my family have a secret?
• Is that secret one that holds me or that person back?
• What would happen if I, or they shared that secret?
• What would happen if I, or they remained silent?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Background~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the past several years, I have been working on the novels that comprise The House of Blessing Casa Saga. I found most Sephardic Jews reticent to speak or write about their families experience during the Inquisition because until twenty years ago, the Decree of Expulsion was still in effect. They feared revealing themselves for they were taught that to do so in a country of only one faith—that of the Catholic Church could place them in peril.

After much research and discussions with a few Spanish Jews, as well as dialogues with those who teach history and literature, I discovered that only a few knew of and understood these people’s lives, religious practices, and personal histories. This disconnection occurred due to the ongoing pressure within Sephardic families to remain hidden within a culture that has been hostile to their existence. This started with the signing of the Decree of Alhambra, which began the Spanish and, later, the Mexican Inquisitions. This decree was in effect until March 31, 1992. Because of this, it is only now that a few brave people are willing to step forward and share their stories.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Corrine's Voice~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was born in 1929 and raised in downtown Los Angeles. My religious training was in the Catholic Church, as all in our family had done for years. In 1984, my son David, who had research our history told me that we are Jewish. I paid no attention to him.

In 1974, I found myself drawn to Jewish things. When my grandmother died, my mother showed me her baptismal certificate. I noticed that her godmother’s last name was Gold. I asked my mother about that, as Gold is a very unusual last name for a Spanish person to have because godparents are usually family members. She told me that her cousin had told her when she was a child that they were Jews but not to tell anyone. It was then I remembered my grandfather singing in a strange language out by the chicken coops, and my mother saying, “He sings like a cantor!”

The realization that we were not what we seemed to be created within me a hunger to know more. Since then I have invested my time and energy to learn all I can about my Jewish roots. That investigation has made me aware of the charges the Inquisitor made against my family, revealed the possibility that they may have come over with Columbus, and the knowledge that they settled in what is now the southwestern United States.

Today, through much work on behalf of my family, I have acquired the documents to prove what I am saying. Were it not for the Decree of Alhambra and the Spanish Inquisition, we would still be in Spain, but due to that decree and its effects upon my family and the Jews still hiding, I am willing to state that what man meant for evil, God used for good! For in Messiah Yeshua, I have found my Jewish Messiah and have been able to own who I am as both a Jew and a believer in my Kinsman Redeemer.

At seventy-four, Corrine Ehrick began to worship as a Sephardic Messianic believer.

Tomorrow - Sephardic Voices

Don’t miss tomorrows posting where Corrine shares a secret that set her free to be who God created her to be.

Praise for Casa de Naomi Reflections Interactive Blog - by Paula Rose Michelson

Since the blog’s opening two and a half weeks ago, three people have praised it! As you read their comments, I hope you will realize how unique this blog is and that its success depends upon your participation in its discourse. After you read the postings, please read my “Meet the Author” post, and tell me something about yourself. I will post your comments on Wednesday, so that everyone involved in this blog will get to know each other as friends do.

This week a viewer wrote, “Glad I stumbled upon this blog cause I've never seen anything like it before. Hope I’m able to catch the next one.”

Last week the blog received two noteworthy comments:
• “This touched my heart.”
• “Lovely blog. I’ll visit it again.”

Meet the Author of the Casa Saga - by Paula Rose

As promised, the next two weeks we are going to get to know each other. Today, I have posted "Meet the Author." Next week I hope to post something about you. But I cannot do that unless you email me and I am praying that you will. So, without further adieu, I present...promise not to laugh, I present, myself.

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Whether I was perusing the book selection of the drugstore or walking down the isles at a bookstore, my quest was always the same. I wanted to select a novel about people I might want to met, written by a person I might want to know. That was important to me because as I read the books I selected some of the characters became my friends. These characters internal landscape influenced mine. I learned many important things without having to live the lesson because the characters did that for me.


I believe that may be true for you as well so I have written this piece. You will notice a degree of levity, which I seldom use in my writing, so let me being by saying, “I am not pulling any punches. What I have written is true and because of that, the miracle of God calling me to write is truly miraculous indeed!"


~~~~~"From “Why Johnny Can’t Read,” to See Paula Write”~~~~~


When I was a new believer I read Ezekiel 11:19. "I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh." Little did I know back then all that this verse would mean to me, or how many times God would challenge me beyond what I felt was my breaking point by this Scripture. However, coming to Messiah (Christ) at forty, I had much to learn, and God put me into, and took me out of situations, and relationships to mold me into this. What you might wonder, is the “this,” that I have become? Well, I’ll tell you, it certainly isn’t the “this” that everyone thought I would be. For as far back as my family and I can remember there was never anyone quite like the “me” I became in Christ, for the beloved transformed me!


But, let me tell you who I was, so you’ll be able to track with me. Ah, that’s easier said than done, to paraphrase a tune that was popular when I was younger, leaner, and couldn’t learn. Yep! That’s right. The book on my mother’s bedside table was titled “Why Johnny Can’t Read." I didn’t know that cause I couldn’t…read, that is. In fact, I only discovered the name of the book once I could, you know… read. By now, you’re probably wondering how a kid born into a family of an up and coming Aerospace Engineer who built the fuel cell that got us into space couldn’t read. My parents and the school wondered about that too, but in the fifties, everyone relied on the doctors who visited the school to give them a heads up if there was a problem with any of us kids. Every time I saw the doc, I got a clean bill of health, eye exam and all, which leads me to believe that the guy needed to have his eyes examined!


Now here comes the hyperbole, which if our parents were speaking would be an, “extravagant exaggeration.” If you think I’m kidding, look it up! I did cause as much as I knew that it was the word I wanted to use, I wasn’t one hundred percent sure how to spell it and I wanted to make sure it was the right word! See what taking a short cut through the first four years of elementary school will get you…a major need for dictionaries, spellchecking, and the like! However, I digress. Now, if you’re like I was, almost the most nearsighted person ever born, with very little peripheral vision, there’s only one thing that can make your learning experience a worse catastrophe than the cards you were dealt. That’s being born with a last name that begins with a letter which will absolutely put you in the chair furthest away from the blackboard, and as surly as I’m tellin this tail, that’s just what happened to yours truly! That’s why I call this ditty, “From Why Johnny Can’t Read to See Paula Write.” Speaking of little ditty’s, if you’re interested in what I mean, look at the refrain from Roger Miller’s song “Little Green Apples” which goes, ‘God didn’t make little green apples and it don’t rain in Indianapolis in the summertime.’ Now that’s poetic license if you ask me, and silly to the core! Yet when I look back on the one summer I had to learn everything all my classmates had learned in four years, what’s a little silly between friends?


I’ll tell you what it is, it’s the ability to laugh at our troubles that we hopefully learn to do before we meet the Lord. Because when were facing bad stuff without him, we’d better know how to laugh or we’ll cry ourselves a river. Though if the truth were told, and that’s what I’m sharing with you, I just learned to be silly this year! You’re probably wondering why it took me so long. Well, I’ll tell you since you seem interested. First, I had to learn how to learn, and then I had to accept myself with all my fears, foibles, and failures. By the time I did all that, I was nineteen and ready to get married, so I found a great guy who loved me back, and we walked down the isle, into wedded bliss and baby diapers galore cause back in the day, pampers didn’t exist. Fact is, back then some of us didn’t even have a clothes dryer. Living close to the ocean in the winter meant hanging the didies, as in diapers’ all over the house. Between babies, bottles, didies, and “The Hubb’s,” life went on happily well into my thirties when I intentionally took myself to college. Now I must confess that I had graduated Beauty College, gotten my Cosmetology License, and gone to work so my guy could finish college. And I must have been a pretty good student, cause I was offered an open-ended scholarship to return and study to become an instructor. Honestly, with my learning curve would you have signed up for that? Course not and neither did I!


However, a strange thing happened on my way to maturity, I discovered I would do whatever I could to make certain my kids had a great start. Anything, including the best preschool I could afford. I didn’t want my kids to end up being taken by the scruff of the neck, by the teacher, and led to the one remaining chair as I was, while she whispered in a voice loud enough to wake the dead, “I’m sitting you next to the smart girl. If you need any help, ask her.” What a confidence builder that was! And, I must add, it was a great way to begin the school year cause everyone knows the really cool kids want to hang out with “the class dummy.” So, given my druthers, I’d have rather run away from “The Hubb’s” who was, and still is the love of my life, than send my kids to school unprepared! Well, boy howdy! Guess where the best preschool was? Give up? Well, I’ll confess! It was part of the local JC, as in Junior College, which we have here in California and funny thing, they had room for my sweetie pie! But I had to be enrolled in the College to get her in. So, I kid you not, I’m sittin here today with a four point 0 average, which in my day was the highest GPA you could have, all because of sweetie pie, who is now thirty plus, and has preschoolers of her own.


All of this my friend, brings me to writing, or as we authors used to say, penning my prose. Wow! I only had to try three alternate spellings to get spell-check to figure out what I meant! This is a red-letter moment…time to ring the bell! It may sound a bit trite, but I think it’s a hoot that a gal who graduated third in her JC class, and went on to teach lots of stuff to some smart people is still humbled by the first thing that happened which, taught her, I’m nothing special unless I’m doing something for someone, or answering a higher call. I’ve been doing that all my like, but in a more focused was since March 2007, when God called me to write about the progeny of a small, and relatively unknown group of Jews called Sephardim that were trapped by the Inquisition, forced into Catholicism to survive, but continued to practice their faith at home.
Before I go any further, remember my saying that I only got funny this year. Well I can prove it! Yep! Way back, way before College, both Beauty, and the JC, people saw me as bookish, and they were right! When you can’t read, and finally can, the light goes on! You know what I mean? It’s like trying to figure out the Scriptures without the Holy Spirit, and then getting every nuance once you receive that Divine gift. Boy oh boy, as a Jew, I sure remember when the light went on and I came to know a lot about Messiah! I still remember a lot about not understanding the Scripture before then. However, that’s a topic for another day.


So being obviously bookish, as in there was always one in my hand, or I was telling someone about something I read. And being married to “The Hubb’s” who had gone to College to become a English teacher, and took classes like Zoology for the fun of it, it took people about two minutes to size me up, and say, “You should be a librarian.” Funny, I finally spelled that word right after all these years, but don’t get to excited, I spelled right, wrong. However, the system corrected it! Nice computer…what would I do without you?


Now, back to the library, if there was one thing I did under-sort-of-stand, it was the Dewey Decimal System. Do any of you out there in reader-land remember that? Well, they put numbers, the name of the book, and the authors’ name, on index cards, but backwards as in ‘all literary people know that library filling systems are backwards.’ I kid you not! The numbers where the first thing you saw when you opened the drawer where the cards were filed. Now if you remember my saying, “I don’t do math on the fly,” oh you don’t remember me saying that until now? My Ops! But…let’s continue, what do you think I did? You’re right! I knew I couldn’t begin to figure out that secret, and even if I did, I didn’t know where to look for the book, so I asked the librarian, after all that’s what she was there for. However, given my age, if you’re in the library, and ask the librarian for help it’s probably not the same one I asked. By the way, if you think asking or looking things up isn’t using the old gray-matter to its best, Einstein, as in Albert, said when he was asked how he came up with all his theories, “I never memorize anything that I can look up.” Yessiree bob, as in Bob’s Big Boy, Einstein, and me, we be buds!


But I digress! I had this desire which, if the truth were known, as in I’m telling it to you now, had been fanned for over ten years by a sweet sister in the Lord. I had gifted her one of my framed poems as a wedding present and once she read it she kept asking me, “Are you writing?” Ten years of that sort of gets a girl thinking. So having nothing better to do once my workday was over but to wait for “The Hubbs” to get back from work at ten, and there being nothing on the boob-tube to watch, but repeats, and inane reality shows, smattered with hour long promos for everything I never needed, I sat down at the computer for forty days, and wrote. Oops I forgot, first I said a prayer, asked for prayer, and discovered some of my friends were Sephardic, go figure! See, God was in this all the time! They gave me some literature, I did a ton and a half of research, and then I started to write.


Now if you remember in Genesis 8: 6-7 the Scripture says, "...after forty days Noah opened the window he had made in the ark and sent out a raven, and it kept flying back and forth until the water had dried up from the earth." Well, interestingly enough, I was sending my daily draft to this friend, and after forty days, she emailed me back. “You’ve begun to write a book!” I though she was “pullin my preverbal leg,” cause all I was doing was writing a character sketch for the book I thought I was going to write. I had it sort of all fleshed out in my thinker. It was going to be about three women who meet while hiking the Appalachian Trail, and how the believing one shares her faith with them as they walk along. I had no, absolutely no plans, to write a book about this Sephardic girl named Naomi! I was writing sketches about her as a means of getting to know her before I began to write the story. This reminds me of that old maxim, “Life is what happens when you’re busy making plans.” Remember that one? If you did, you have a better thinker than I had, cause it never occurred to me that my friend was right! However, once I went back, and read what I’d written, I discovered that Isaiah 55:8 seemed to be written just for me! It says, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. So here I was, fully commissioned to a calling I felt ill prepared to fulfill, as in call the other gal…please! Nevertheless, being a Messianic Jew, which means rather stiff-necked, but interested, I began to write and, the oddest thing happened, the characters began to speak to me, and tell me their stories. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Bring in the net! This one’s ready for the loony bin!” But I was, and am as sane as you are. Know why I know? Cause having graduated with honors, I went back to school, yes sir! JC you had me at hello! This time I studied to become of all things, a Chemical Dependency – Lifestyle Disorder Counselor. Which is just a fancy- smanchy way of saying, I found another way to read interesting stuff, meet some really smart people, and help out those that needed a carrying person to listen to them, and hold them accountable, kind of like we do when we’re discipling, and teaching others about Gods Word, and our Christian walk.
So, when the characters began to talk, I listened. After all, that’s what a counselor does, listen, which if you ask my friends they’ll tell you is something I have trouble doing. However, if your anointed and appointed, whether its to listen to someone strung out on drugs, or to the blessing of hearing what I, to this day, believe was a God breathed revelation of what I was to write, its amazing how quiet you become. Why? I’ll tell you why, cause when you’re called, I believe God has already fashioned you to answer the calling. In fact, if we look at good old Moe…Moses to you, we know this for a fact. You don’t believe me? Well, let’s take a look. First, when the dude finally owns his roots, he tries to stop a fight and ends up having to hotfoot it out of Egypt in a hurry…which if we know and trust in God, we won’t do! Now the second way is Gods way! Here we see God calling, and appointing Moses, and when God sends him back, good old Moe is equipped, and accomplishes Gods’ purpose.


That’s the way it is with me, and you! "Me?" you ask? Of course you! Why do you think I’m writing this piece? It isn’t cause I have nothing better to do! I still have the last novel of the six to write. You heard me right, six novels in the Casa Saga. Five down and one more to go in this series. Then it’s on to the next assignment, another series, and another blessing yet to be revealed! So ya see, I have plenty to do. I’m writing this for you so that you’ll know that whatever God has called you to do, if you receive his commission wholeheartedly, and move forward trusting he will meet you at the burning bush, or anywhere else you need him! One day you’ll be telling others how God took you, and used you in a way you were never prepared to be used. You’ll be singing his praises, and it won’t matter if anyone asks why you enjoy being a servant of the Servant King, the one who will return to reign in glory. For all the reward people like you, and me will ever need is serving him, as he called us to, even if it means doing the one thing we know we can’t do. After all, we know that everything here will fade away, so why not answer Gods call, and store up in glory what matters for eternity! Ezekiel was right after all, when God puts a “New Spirit” in you, what else can you do but respond joyfully to his!

Never Forget by Paula Rose michelson

For many, ten years ago on this day, the world changed. For some, the world ended. For all who lived in America, it was a wakeup call that we will never forget, nor should we. To forget means that life has no value. To forget means it can happen again. To forget might mean it could happen to you or someone you love. Never forget, always be ready! Never allow the memory of those peaceful lingering summer, winter, spring, and fall days since we fought the last World War to dim. For if we do, we will reap what we haven’t sown, a world of anarchy and terror where who we are and what we believe will make us a target for others agendas.

Reflections – Through a Glass Darkly by Paula Rose Michelson

We have begun a great journey together you and me! Along the way, we might learn from each other and in that learning become aware of a greater landscape than the one we know. During that time, we may reflect and wonder why some make the choices they do. Whether we reflect on something, we or someone else has done or not done, personal reflection moves us from darkness to light. From where we are to where we are going. Since all of us are on a journey, sharing our experiences can enrich the lives of those who pay attention and maybe help some stay the course they have chosen.


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When I opened Casa de Naomi Reflections, I invited everyone I knew on Face Book, and Twitter to visit and join. Therefore, I was surprised that none of my friends had sent me any comments. Taking matters into my own hands, I emailed some of my mishpukah (extended family) asking for their assistance. One lady told me the questions I had posted were to superficial. Another felt that answering the quires would be to revealing. Yet four stalwart friends responded. Their cherished answers appear below.


Before you read them, I believe I owe you an apology for I assumed that those following this blog knew each other and me. However, after reviewing each person following this blog, I discovered that only three of you know me. When I realized that I had not created a Safe Haven in which we could share, I decided that next week I will tell you something about me and I hope that you will let everyone get to know you the following week by sharing something about you as well. Also, just to finish the tidying up – as it were, since I now write two blogs, I will be posting to my Casa de Naomi Reflections Blog on Wednesdays.


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Before you read the responses, I need to mention that they are grouped by question rather than respondent and since some seemed to be concerned with keeping private things private, I will share the initials of everyone who sent a response before you read their comments, thus preserving anonymity for all.


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I want to thank T.C., A.O., K.F., and N.U. for their thoughtful comments. Since this is an interactive blog, I invite you to send me your thoughts, which I will post, after you have perused this article.


Text: Naomi knew she was in trouble the moment the immigration official had told her, he was taking her to Ellis Island.


Question: When have you been in trouble?

Answers:

• I can get into trouble by just opening my mouth at the wrong time.

• I have gotten in trouble at work, at school, in social or religious settings.



Question: Did you create the problem or was it foisted upon you?

Answers:

• Most of the time I get myself into messes, but sometimes I did follow the wrong crowd.

• Sometimes I helped create the problem without realizing it because I did not understand the personality conflicts or the situation (I did not have all the data). Sometimes they were foisted upon me; this is why I do not believe the Human Race is truly “good” but in need of the Messiach (Christ) because I have learned about the hearts of people and my own.


Question: Did someone help you?

Answers:

• Yes, the Lord has always sent me the wisdom to know whom I should trust, and given me the ability to trust them. I was blessed to have a faith that would give me wisdom to also stay out of trouble, but growing up I always had to test the waters.

• Most of the time no one helped me, except for the one rare occasion when I was homeless and my “second mother” helped me.


Question: If you received help, did the person expect something in return?

Answers:

• Upon occasion the help offered from others had a price or expectation, but not from my “second mother.” She told me to “pay it forward” so to speak.

• No, I only had to get back on the path and do my best to stay on the path. I would also try to help others by sharing my experiences and maybe helping someone to stay out of trouble.


Text: She remembered leaving her family in the middle of the night without an explanation or a good-bye and tears threatened to fall.


Question: Have you ever left family or friends without telling them why?

Answers:

• Yes, they did not care where I was or what I was doing, even when a car hit me.

• I ran away from home, which lasted only a few hours because as a mother I had too many responsibilities, and believed that no one would make a meal or tuck my kids in at night.


Question: Have you ever felt trapped?

Answers:

• Many, many, many, times.

• Don’t all children feel trapped at times?


Question: Did you find yourself wishing for the problem to disappear?

Answers:

• You betcha!

• Prayed that the problem would disappear, or I would.


Question: Were you able to handle the situation as it unfolded?

Answers:

• Sometimes: I had to learn how to survive, sometimes that was not a job done well. I have learned a lot in adversity.

• It is hard to handle a situation when blame for anything bad is laid at your feet.



Text: Naomi gasped. Maybe God is watching out for me after all!


Question: When troubles come your way, do you engage in wishful thinking?

Answers:

• All the time, but I soon realized there was no hope and no change (in the past).

• Sometimes wishful thinking helps me let go and allow God to take His rightful position in my life. Unless I can acknowledge what my heart wishes for I cannot lay those wishes at the throne of grace.



Question: Do you believe that behavior is neither good nor bad?

Answers:

• Nope, behavior matters, it must be as per scripture.

• I never have considered behavior as good or bad. This is a very intriguing question. I will have to consider and get back with you.


Question: If you had to face a horrid situation, would someone help you?

Answer:

I have been in situations where I have had help and other times when I have not had any help. What these situations have done for me is to realize that help comes from many directions. God always provides a refuge and even if family or friends are not there for me He always brings someone to my side. Just this year I was blessed with a friend I only knew as an acquaintance came to my side when family turned away from me. Our God is faithful if we lay down at His throne of grace and mercy.


Question: Do you believe that consequences are just or random?

Answers:

• I believe they are just, although they may appear random.

• I cannot believe this and believe that God holds my future. Either I believe God or my feelings or I choose to believe in a faithful God.


Question: Are you safe because someone makes you feel or says you are safe?

Answers:

• Both.

• Neither because it comes down to me, I have to chose to believe in something outside myself.


Question: What might you have to give up or become to feel safe?

Answers:

• I need to have more faith in the 'Audience of One.'

• At one time I gave up everything to feel safe. Now I’m reclaiming my life.


Question: When you are in danger, can you make yourself believe you are safe?

Answers:

• I try to remember to pray, and then make a decision. Hopefully, it’s a safe one, it depends. I have betrayed others twice by making myself safe, an act of omission.

• Danger for me means I’ve lost control so no I can’t make myself feel anything at the time cause my energy is feeding the problem.


Question: Is life more important than the way you live it?

Answers:

• Life is a roller coaster ride. My life is only important if it is fulfilling the plans He has for me. This is of the utmost importance. I do not know if I would give my life for someone else or for His witness yet. Someday I may know if I can or, like Peter, flee. Right now, I do not know.

• The way I live is my life so the question is backwards. If my life didn’t matter then I wouldn’t be here. It’s that simple and that complicated!


Summary Question: When Tía helped Naomi enter America illegally, was she thinking of herself or the girl?


Answers:

• Seldom does anyone do anything for someone else’s good without there being strings attached.

• I believe that whenever we do anything, we have our own personal motives. Even when we help others, it can be for personal benefit. I do not believe that Tia was helping Naomi to benefit herself only. Somehow, it seems to me like a calling she has. Whether or not she is going about it in the right way could be something to think about. I think Tia is a unique person, with a unique calling; it will take awhile to truly understand her and see her calling come to fruition!

Tomorrow Your Responses

I had thought to post responses to the blog today. Although several followers sent their comments to me, I have to wait until tomorrow to post them because one follower sent comments but they were unreadable. When I notified her, she told me that she was away from her office and would resend tomorrow.


I find this waiting very tantalizing. Especially since I have not read anything that, I received. Like you, dear friend, I await tomorrow with baited breath.